From last week:
A: "How did Leshar [a lizard-man PC] escape from the gladiator pits?"
B: "He pretended to be luggage."
"Leshar was glad he ate her!"
"They've got a man-crush on Leshar."
"Mixed metaphors are one of the mysteries of his church."
"Not even the bad guys wanted him on their side."
From last night:
"He looks like somebody just stole his blueberry muffin."
"You can burn your bridges. You can burn your britches. Just don't burn the bread."
A: "I can't find the button to roll a perception check."
B: "That means you get disadvantage on your roll."
"Apparently I'm oblivious but very persuasive."
"You can probably get some privacy out in the barn."
"The head official stands up like somebody put an electric shock to his ass."
"Use your paladinism!"
"I'll get right in the faces of the dandy-boys and smile."
"Attempting smackage....smackage achieved!"
"Boom! There's paladin all over the place!"
"Hard to score a hit when you're slippin' in your own piss."
"Use your ruler, see how long it is."