Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Adventure Sound Bites

Ken's (Rusty Battleaxe) Montporte Megadungeon is going strong. Here are the soundbites from last night's session.

Player: Does "sleep" work on sheep?
GM: Of course. They count people.

I'm hung like a gnome.

You mean there's a naked sorceress running around here now? Cool! New Quest!

So...they grew some big ones.

New magic item: Ring of Heartburn!

New magic item: Cloak of the Flasher!

We've discovered that the Monteporte Megadungeon conveniently has several 10'x10' two-holer restrooms. Each of these is now known as a...


A PC looks down the hole of a Montporte-a-potty for treasure... 
Player A: Anything good in there?
Player B: No, just a bunch of worthless crap.

PC standing next to a teleporter pad...
Player: I pull down my pants and take a leak on it.
(and this despite the fact that we just passed another Montporte-a-potty).

Player: I've got 8 charisma.
GM: And you sure are getting the most out of it.


  1. Yeah, the peeing thing. He whips it out any chance he gets. We have a weird thief. And you notice, the way he detects for traps is just open everything and open it doesn't hit his tiny head.

    1. He might be a lycanthrope marking his territory.

  2. I'm going to have to put a naked sorceress in one of my games.

  3. I always feared gnomes were huge!

  4. Came by to check your Chubba Bubba Mondays. Woohoo. Go you.